Can you buy me a shiny red Ferrari? Can you cook a roast dinner for Freddy, my fat Labrador?
Those probably aren’t kindnesses.
Could someone handy help me fix a leaky tap? It’s my son’s 6th birthday, could anyone help me make a Spiderman cake? We're doing a beach clean, have you got a spare hour?
All kindnesses. Why? Several reasons:
1. We humans want to be kind and helpful.
But we don’t know what others want or need. This is something that comes up time and time again in our research.
For example, I bet you’d happily pick up Margery’s prescription on Wednesday if you’re free.
But how would you know Margery is stuck if she doesn’t ask?
It’s the same in reverse. People want to help you. So do them a favour and add a request.
2. You’re enabling someone else to give.
Science says that giving makes us feel good.
And life’s hard, a reason to be helpful may be exactly what the other person needs right now.
3. Kn, thank yous and time given / received
On T4G, acts of kindness big or small are rewarded with points we call Kn. Kn counts towards rewards.
The person helping you now has more Kn and is closer to receiving something nice. All because you performed the kind task of asking!
Plus…
Time will be added to their time-given-received column, showing they’re a good community member.
And they’ll receive a big fat thank you from you to add to their collection of thank yous. Yeah, on T4G members collect ‘thank yous’ and 'kindness' instead of ‘likes’ and ‘shares’.
Loveliness happens when people give. By asking, you’re enabling it.
Oh and by the way, you’ll get a few Kn too! Because, as we’re establishing right now, asking is a kindness too.
3. You’re helping grow a micro volunteering culture
Micro volunteering isn’t just for charities and good causes. We can micro volunteer for one another.
Picking up Margery’s prescription, or someone putting your bins out, that’s person to person micro volunteering. And it’s wonderful.
4. Paying it forward
Since Colin The Caveman, our communities have been powered by reciprocity. Kind and supportive communities survived and thrived.
When we receive kindness our natural inclination is to pay it forward.
Having received your small act of kindness you might respond to a request or add an offer. Keeping the cycle of kindness flowing, and getting rewarded in the process.
And that person who helped you, they are also more likely to give or request kindness again.
Before you know it’s snowing kindness and there’s a snowball snowballing down your street.
And you started it all simply by asking.